God's Chisel
It came out of the blue.
My wife, Jennifer, and I were newly married when it first happened. What exactly “it” was, I had no idea but it was bad. Very bad. My whole world started spinning uncontrollably. To call it extreme vertigo or nausea doesn’t do it justice. It took me 45 minutes to move from the driver's seat to the passenger seat. The slightest movement of my head caused terrifying, almost unbearable vertigo.
That episode passed but there were more. Many more. Sometimes it was a lack of balance. Other times it sentenced me to days of misery in bed. It might last a few hours or several days. Months of medical testing ensued. I’d already served 12 years in the Air Force and intended to retire after 20 years. I had been selected for Officer Training School. Was all of it going to come crashing down?
I vividly recall one horrific episode that lasted all weekend. I lay in bed with the room as dark as possible. I had to crawl to the bathroom. The medicine I’d been given to knock me out didn’t help. I was overwhelmed and scared. Then a thought hit me. I could praise Him. I could still praise the Lord!
I’d been saved for 10 years. God had changed my life, blessed me with Jennifer, and given me a love for life and for telling others about this wonderful God who saved me. Despite the pain, I could praise Him for who He is and for what He has done for me. And that’s what I did!
I praised Him. ”This won’t be my forever! I will be healed one day! I can choose to glorify my awesome Savior in the middle of this storm!” That experience still is one of the highlights of my Christian walk.
After two years of these horrendous episodes, one day I woke and couldn’t hear out of my left ear. There was no blockage and more tests followed. Long story short, I was medically retired as a Security Forces officer prior to deployment. On a sobering note, the captain who replaced me was killed on that deployment. Did God spare my life?
The Lord changed my attitude. I had previously seen myself as a tough guy, able to push through anything. Weakness was for “wimpy” people. Can I even describe how incredibly humbling it is to be unable to walk down a hallway without slamming uncontrollably into the wall? To have to quickly get your car to the side of the road because it suddenly feels like it’s flipping sideways?
God was and continues to humble me. I praise Him for it and hope I can glorify Him more as He continues to use His chisel to conform me to the image of His Son.
– Eric Hentnik
